We have no phone service. Apparently not content with cutting me off the cable modem, the squirrels appear to have chewed through our phone lines as well. Scott says it's like a horror movie: "There's no phone...we're completely cut off...and the squirrels are out there." I have strung a long ethernet cable in the most irresponsible way imaginable out David's office door, down the stairs, and through the living room into my office so I can access the internet through the cable modem. Someone is going to break his neck for the sake of my e-mail addiction.
I was too sick to go to school today. I feel like I've abandoned my students. I actually feel a little better today; it's possible I was just exhausted this morning. I didn't sleep well all night, and in the middle of my not sleeping well Eric woke up crying and didn't go back down for over an hour. I believe this is the first time he's woken us up in the night for something other than simple hunger, except a couple of weeks ago when he had a stuffy nose that kept waking him up, but even then he went right to sleep as soon as I reclined him on my chest so his nose would drain. As I was pacing the bedroom floor with my howling infant at 2:30 a.m., I said to David, "Now, this is what I thought motherhood would be like! At last, my vision is fulfilled!" Eric went to sleep about 3, twenty four minutes after a dose of infant Tylenol and three minutes after I decided he was too warm and took him out of his sleep sack. So it's possible we're dealing with an ear infection (he was rubbing his right ear a lot) and the Tylenol eased the pain, or it's possible his teeth hurt him and the Tylenol eased the pain, or it's possible it was just an extreme case of Infantile Roasting Syndrome. We'll see what the doctor says; we have an appointment in about an hour.
Eric is on the floor of my office right now, playing with the contents of my wastebasket. Many interesting pieces of paper.
I read a story at the Prism Awards last night. When we got home, David and I were chatting with Scott, who had stayed home to watch Eric, and Scott said, "Su, your hair looks really good, by the way." I said, "Yeah, but it will be hard to re-create the effect." Here's what I did with my hair yesterday: took a shower at the last possible minute before taking Eric to the Family Growth Center, and was in such a hurry that I forgot to comb it after I towel-dried it. Realizing this after I dropped Eric off, I frantically finger-combed it in the car. Then, after picking Eric up, I crawled into bed with him for a two-hour nap before dragging my butt out of bed mere moments before David and I had to leave. It was pure Providence. I told Scott, "God is my hairdresser."
Later: back from the doctor. Eric has pinkeye, and infections in both ears. Eye drops are already starting to clear up his goopy eyes, and he likes the bubble-gum flavored antibiotics he's taking for the ear infection, so hopefully he'll start feeling better soon.
I just got an e-mail from a department at MSU called Integrated Arts and Humanities saying that my name had been given to them by the English Dept. as someone who might be interested in applying for an assistantship for this coming academic year. I am not (teaching IAH classes is a life-consuming nightmare, from all reports), but I am inferring some things from this e-mail: first, that the English Department expects to admit me into the Ph.D. program for the coming academic year, and second, that they do not intend to fund me.
I would say that, with department funding, there is about a 4% chance I will actually go back to graduate school in the fall. Without funding, 0%. If I do not go back to school in the fall, the chance that I will actually complete my half-finished master's thesis drops to about 6%. As it is, I am fighting the temptation almost daily to just take all the books back to the library. And perhaps that would be best; I’d hate for the pile to fall on the baby and cause him grievous bodily harm.
Posted by Su Penn at February 20, 2004 02:06 AM | TrackBack